Corporate Lessons

Corporate Lesson 1

A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing up
her
shower when the doorbell rings. After a few seconds of arguing over
which one should go and answer the doorbell, the wife gives up,
quickly
wraps herself up in a towel and runs downstairs. When she opens the
door, there stands Bob, the next door neighbor. Before she says a
word, Bob says, "I'll give you 800 dollars to drop that towel that
you have
on." After thinking for a moment, the woman drops her towel and
stands
naked in front of Bob. After a few seconds, Bob hands her 800
dollars
and leaves. Confused, but excited about her good fortune, the woman
wraps back up in the towel and goes back upstairs. When she gets
back to the bathroom, her husband asks from the shower "Who was
that?" "It
was
Bob the next door neighbor," she replies. "Great," the husband says,
"did he say anything about the 800 dollars he owes me?"

Moral of the story:

If you share critical information pertaining to credit and risk in
time with your stakeholders, you may be in a position to prevent
avoidable
exposure.

Corporate lesson 2:

A priest was driving along and saw a nun on the side of the road, he
stopped and offered her a lift which she accepted. She got in and
crossed her legs, forcing her gown to open and reveal a lovely
leg. The priest had a look and nearly had an accident. After
controlling the car,
he slid his hand up her leg. The nun looked at him and immediately
said, "Father, remember psalm 29?" The priest was flustered and
apologized
profusely. He forced himself to remove his hand. However, he was
unable to remove his eyes from her leg. Further on while changing
gear, he let
his hand slide up her leg again. The nun once again said, "Father,
remember psalm 29?" Once again the priest apologized. "Sorry sister
but the flesh is weak." Arriving at the convent, the nun got out gave
him
a meaningful glance and went on her way. On his arrival at the church,
the
priest rushed to retrieve a bible and looked up psalm 29. It Said,
"Go forth and seek, further up, you will find glory."

Moral of the story:

Always be well informed in your job, or you might miss a great
opportunity!

Corporate Lesson 3:

Usually the staff of the company play football. The middle level
managers are more interested in Tennis. The top management usually
has a preference for Golf.

Finding:

As you go up the corporate ladder, the balls reduce in size.

Corporate Lesson 4:

A sales rep, an administration clerk and the manager are walking to
lunch when they find an antique oil lamp. They rub it and a Genie
comes out in a puff of smoke. The Genie says, "I usually only grant
three wishes, so I'll give each of you just one." "Me first! Me
first!"
says the admin clerk. "I want to be in the Bahamas, driving a
speedboat, without a care in the world." Poof! She's gone. In
astonishment, "Me
next! Me next!" says the sales rep. "I want to be in Hawaii,
relaxing on the beach with my personal masseuse, an endless supply
of pina
coladas
and the love of my life." Poof! He's gone. "OK, you're up," the
Genie says to the manager. The manager says, "I want those two
back
in the office after lunch."

Moral of story:

Always let your boss have the first say.